The fourth annual Australian Cultural Evening was the most adventurous yet, featuring an international trip to the charming holiday resort town of Tijuana in relaxing Mexico. Of a "catchment" of 1600 WinWriters Help Conference delegate, the turnout was low in percentage terms but high in spirits.
The brave souls who risked their lives for the sake of cultural enlightenment were:
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The evening started with a few drinks at the tacky
white sports bar at the Conference venue, and soon proceeded to the red tram for
the hour long (and $5 return ticket) trip to the border.
The mood on the tram was relaxed, with a nuance of anticipation of the evening ahead. Tony distributed some fruit tingles (a popular Australian sweet) while Kristen passed around some Haemorrhoids (apparently a popular English sweet). This led to the inevitable round of scatological jokes, at which Ian Carr demonstrated the English always excel.
Ivana
was chatting with a pair of Hispanic Australians on the tram before she realised
they weren't with us, and couldn't speak English.
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Mexico at last. |
As soon as the border was reached, George regaled us with her
thoughts on the use of the word "wee" in polite society. (Perhaps
she'd had one too many Rectumoids on the tram.) Once the shock of the splendour
of the Tijuana streetscape has worn off, the 13 of us were swindled into two
taxis for the relaxing cruise into the elegant shopping district. We could not
help but marvel at the ready availability of pharmacies, dentists, and panel
beaters in the neat and prim boulevards.
After paying the taxi drivers the equivalent of 4 years
of wages, we spotted a delightful restaurant just calling out for our patronage.
(Literally.) The shielas had a quick inspection of the toilets, and returned
with faces the colour of guacamole, mumbling something about not eating,
drinking our touching anything. Meanwhile, Jamie and Tony hooked into some
splendid tucker. The rest of the Australians decided that beer was the answer,
(with the exception of Brian, who showed a bit more sense, at this stage at
least). So Coronas in hand, we toasted the Mexican people while admiring the
sweeping views down Avenue des Revolución.
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A bucket of beer and a shiela to talk to. Like a pig in muck. |
Jamie: Where's my beer? I though I put it on my head? |
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A bloke to talk to, and a table full of beer. Like a pig in muck. Wendy and Rick share a joke. |
Maria says "Look, I can stick this taco in my ear!" |
The hunger pangs setting in could not overpower the recollection of the hygiene in the kitchen, so it was off into the night. We bid adios to the other patrons, busy having tequila poured down their throats by whistle blowing waiters. We ambled down the busy Avenue, momentarily losing Brian into a curtained nudie show, before reaching the pinnacle of the Mexican culinary experience - the Hard Rock Cafe.
A quick inspection of the toilets resulted in glowing endorsements for this new venue. So we settled down to our burrito soup and marguerites, and a few more Coronas, rowdy conversation, and a good time.
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| Check out the size of my margarita! | Are these prices in pesos or dollars? |
After our non-toxic meal, we had a stroll down the streets of
Tijuana, inspecting the fine local handicraft and viagra. But our evening had to
end, because we had a border to cross and a tram to catch. So after buying some
contraband Kahlua, kitch souvenir hats, and inappropriate artifacts, we were off
to the border. This time, we sensibly crammed into three taxis, and were whisked
to the somewhere near the border gates. We had time to marvel at two youths
running across lines of traffic yelling "Ariba! Ariba!".
At this point, George realised she'd taken the US entry visa out of her passport, and on Maria's suggestion, the rest of us quickly decided to abandon her and make a run for it. However, the Immigration official decided not to jail or fine her. Another lucky escape for Kristen, who questioned another official about why they hadn't used a sniffer dog to find the drugs.
| The tram ride home was uneventful, and we all looked cool. | ||
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| Ivana looks just like a local. | Jack snuggles his duty free grog. | The word "dag" springs to mind. |
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| Patty
looks suitably stunned by the event, while Kirsten thinks if she closes her eyes it will all go away. |
And
here's a Jamie shot of Matthew photographing something. |
The final chapter in the saga was a stopover for a few of the stayers to sample Mardi Gras. Unfortunately, we lost Maria and Brian in the heaving mass of humanity, but they surfaced again 12 hours later.
As they say, a great night was had by all!
